Remembering My 'other' big brother- Richard

It's been a looooong time since I wrote in this blog site and I had recently re-opened this so as to recap our life in Singapore. All those words, so so long ago, most written very late at night and many have photos taken down as I went through a stage of deleting pictures but boy, SO MANY memories.. but here's a 'comeback' of sorts but mainly a way for me to remember someone who means a lot to my family.

My 'other' Brother

I have many memories of Richard during our childhood years in Kuching, Malaysia. Richard and my brother were friends since elementary years and I frequently see him at our birthday parties. My first impression was of this soft-spoken, fair-skinned, well-dressed boy. He was kind to his best friend’s annoying little sister, sometimes teasing me with his raised eyebrows. 

When he left for Australia as a teen, he will return very popular from all the year-end ‘raging’ parties that I would hear about the next day. I do admit he was a cool teen back then, LOL! Fast forward to our twenties Richard (living in Melbourne), accepted the role as my brother’s best man and we all reconnected again. I was appointed the Richard-sitter but the job quickly became redundant as many (ladies) were more than happy to show him around Brisbane. When Clara came to the picture, I was thrilled to see how Clara had such a calming and steady effect on Richard. We met Clara for the first time in our Wollongong days. When Alex moved our young family to Singapore and we met up with Richard as soon as we arrived. I won’t claim to be the ‘oldest’ friend of Richard, I would say I feel the most loved.

Richard (alongside Clara) took on the big brother/uncle role to my family right from the get-go! When we moved to Singapore, the girls were only 2.5 and 5! We were car-less and homeschooling (till we could get into a school), so it was a juggle to say the least. Those were the Cairn-Hill Condo days when they too were super busy with their teen children. They always included us every weekend- to venture out, have meals or swim at the British club. British club food was my girls’ access to delicious Indian and ‘Ang-mo’ food, LOL. Richard naturally became our trusted ‘everything’ advisor. He totally hit it off with Alex and both got right into conversations about finances, coffee and especially gadgets. 

  

Both Clara & Richard (aka the power team) have helped us set up financial stability in so many ways and have been an awesome influence to us. I know I broke Richard’s (& Clara’s) heart when we decided to move to the USA. Richard made the gentleman’s effort to walk through our decisions while ensuring we are aware of our choices. We knew we had very little chances of returning to live in Singapore, but he quietly let us go but you know what? Within a few months, he & Clara (& little Sam-Sam) became our first visitors and that meant the world to me & my kids.

“Auntie Richard & Uncle Clara” (as we affectionately call them) became/was our family. When Carson came along and I experienced my first ever ‘moon-yit’, we had the Wongs come over for dinner often. It was such a lovely time amidst the exhaustion of having a newborn baby. They spent time with the girls and helped us get back on our feet. Right at the end of this short month, they even helped us out of a scary, not-nice-helper situation.

Looking back, we regret not visiting Singapore more often. We were however thankful that Letitia and I dropped in July-Aug 2025 to just hang out with Richard and Clara. We enjoyed going to the (now new) old haunts and their canteen aka ‘Great World’ and were also introduced to many more amazing eating places. Enjoying food together was an always a fun thing we do though I kept piling on the weight and somehow both Richard and Clara always stayed slim (?!) This is what we, as a family, will miss the most. Often the teasing and banter and the loud laugh that explodes when Richard finds something funny! I know Alex will surely miss all his wisdom, research on all things coffee gadgets. They have an old boys group chat that I hear is very controversial but hilarious. I will miss his ‘heeeey!’ voice when he responds to us.

Richard, you left us too soon. Our hearts are broken yet we hold strong to the memories you left us. My family will keep you in our hearts for as long as possible. Your family is ours and Clara & kids will always have a home where we are. I wish I can do more than just pray for Clara & family but, I pray for strength to meet each new day, for moments to weep and for floods of memories of joy, for community that holds tight and especially for the deep, deep knowledge that you loved them, to the moon and back.