Letitia in her class play: Robin Good

Robin Good by Primary 3Agape

Happy Birthday Mathena (7th)

Our family celebration with the Wongs for Mathena's 7th, at Manhattan Fish Market, City Square
"This year took soooo long to come around!", this was Mathena major complain as she started 'waiting' for the birthday since last October!!! As a very patience mom, I remember at least 1-2 a month when my dear baby will ask me, 'Mommy, when is my birthday coming?' My answer will be, "9 months more dear.."
Being our truly 'laughter in her heart' child, it's tough to say 'no!' to her. Mathena beams in life, in joy and savours so much of life in a matter-of-fact manner. Nothing phases her out, nothing stops her nor discourages her. For example, I was already feeling bad as I knew around her birthday, the weekends will be FULL of activities from our commitments etc. I struggle to even 'squeeze' in a timing slot for her to have a cake.
Mathena says, "Mom, what about JUST a playdate and I invite my friends?". I answered, 2 friends! And, there we had a little get together of 2.5hrs of her bestest friends. Right after we rushed home from puppetry practice in church. Zoom zoom!
Just when I thought all the birthday nice-ties were done, my dear girl said, 'Mom, my classmates all say that they DO NOT like cupcakes for birthdays'. I was thinking of just ordering and bringing them to the class on her birthday.... "They ALL prefer goodie bags!!!"
This 7-year old has now, in her short little time on earth, dance ballet for 4.5years, have learnt drama for 1 year, has practice swimming for 3 years, have been speaking Chinese since 2 years ago, is now reading mini paperbacks (100-150 words per page) and sings on stage for church. She's travelled to UK. Scotland, Hong Kong, Thailand, Malaysia and of course Australia. Isn't she just the go-getter in our family. We love you heaps and wishes for more adventures with you the following year. Happy Birthday my sweet 'baby' girl!

LADIES NIGHT~ ChanFamilyVersion

Now, before anyone conjures up images of a bunch of ladies prancing around town,
party mood and without reservations, allow me to explain that this 'Ladies Night' (LN) is
entirely and altogether for a different purpose.

Being a parent of 2 girls, we've been reminded again and again our God-given role
and responsibility to bring them up as GOD's intended gift to the world
around them. To achieve this, we have to preserve them long enough so that their
hearts and minds can be vessels for GOD's work in His kingdom. Many times, I've
been given the burden plus the prompting that we are parenting, not for our own
glory, not for the country and even more, not for ourselves.

Hence, my cooking up of LN.
My happy 9yo, thoroughly enjoying this special time with mommy!

After much trembling, seeking and praying, I came up with this idea to regularly
take my girls out (working on No 1 first!) with the intention to talk and discuss heart
to heart, mother to child about life, about growing up and also about the many 'deep'
personal issues little girls face when they are growing up.
(Some will call it the feathers & the stings, get it?)
Anything crafty and fun!

I am recording this in our blog as it is a HUGE milestone in our lives. For one thing,
this series of discussions are been too loooong delayed and it is heart wrenching to see and know
that our girls are growing up. Another reason for doing this, is also to encourage other
moms to take this challenge to recapture and preserve their girls for as long as they
possibly can. It is about building the trust, the relationship and the foundation so that when the girls need a place of solace to run to, mommy can be their choice companion.Having fun with bubbles!

Just in case anyone is thinking that we are living in some sort of bubble and we
have some weird idea of keeping our girls in a crystal cocoon. We are NOT! What
we are merely doing is taking back and acting on our rightful responsibility as
parents to teach into our kids, our values, our morals and mostly, what the Bible
(and what we believe GOD) wants us to have and know. Doing nothing is letting the media and the world 'teach' our kids. Doing nothing is giving way to letting
the children take opinions of other people's values. We don't want to do NOTHING!
Letitia is my cuddle-girl. She never gets enough of it, phew!

My greatest fear is that one day my girls will no longer believe that I love
them, GOD loves them and they are heading for the '2nd best' (compromise) in life.
I am praying that my time with them will allow them into my thoughts, my heart
and build trusts/confidence in them. I want to walk alongside them as they
learn to stand up against the corrupted values they confront each day. I want them to
know that no matter how tough life gets (gets into trouble?), my love for them means that I will not desert them. The consequences will still follow but
my time and my support and my cuddles will heap on.She's the happiest when we hang out as a family.

Now, how is LN done?
Firstly, set and make the commitment to regularly go out (once a 2-3 week)and take turns planning. I have asked Letitia to bring a notebook (top secret
for her eyes only) along for her to take notes and thoughts down. We'll chat
firstly about any concerns brought up during school life. Eg. why were the boys
so into pictures of naked ladies (are you shocked the the exposure your 9yos
are getting at school?), why do other kids watch the 9pm chinese adult soap
series etc. Then, I will prayerfully talk about her, what she is going through now
as a 9yo child physically and what to expect. From basic biological views to
physical changes. I am covering only 1-2 points (I relate them together) and
I know it's enough. It's information overload and the notebook allows her to get back to it during the week to ask/write questions or thoughts she needs to talk about or share. The time required is about 2 hours, inclusive of some food (of course! Thanks Monica for your reminder!) plus somewhere quite private and not too noisy. One of Letitia's favourite food: 小龙包 （Steam Pork Dumplings)

Letitia chose the restaurant and we went to a nearby Din Tai Fung. She was happy to just slurp at the dumplings one at a time. It is quite a joy to see her enjoy her food (I was told this will all change when they get figure conscience) and hoping that she'll always have a healthy appetite. Come on, she's hardly overweight, right? There's room for expansion!

As I'd like to end the evening with something fun, it's not hard to search for fun and simple activities to do. Walks, crafts, ice cream/dessert are some. This allowed us some winding down conversation and I will mentally remind her of our love (as parents) for her and that she can come to us, anytime and for ANY reason.

So there. My records of this new journey with Letitia. Mathena will get her turn when she turns 9yo. Meanwhile, I am already praying and thinking of the next topic and thoughts to chat about (been reading 2-3books at the same time) and also thinking of a nice 'quieter' place instead of the one like Din Tai Fung. Friday nights may not be the choice too as the restaurants are packed and everyone's hungry! On this note, I want to encourage ALL moms I personally know, to start thinking about what 'plans' you have, what direction you (and your husband) have thought of with regards to talking to your children about the birds and the bees. It does not have to be just ONE talk. It does not have to be a lecture. It does not have to be like the above. It however, has to be a deliberate EFFORT. It also has to be a lifestyle, an attitude and mostly the relationship (parent with child) has to be built and built SOLID too. It still rings in my head, the words of Josh McDowell when he shared in our church, 'TRUTH without relationship leads to REJECTION, RULES without RELATIONSHIP leads to REBELLION, Discipline without RELATIONSHIP leads to Anger!"

Pray for our next LN!

What Dreams Are Made of

Today was a super tiring super rewarding day. Our ENTIRE family, Alex included work
up early to head out in preparation for the girl's dance school's 38th Anniversary concert. This is the first ever concert we've done in Singapore since we arrived.
Letitia was part of a 3-part Chinese dance troupe doing the ribbon dance and she's practiced a whole term. The dance performance was spectacular and she looked like a proper acrobatic dancer minus all the bends and twists.
Alex was asked to help out with the photo taking of the concert, post and pre rehearsal etc. He did a pretty good job and even roped in his camera buddy to help enhance the experience. We've got these pics to keep for a long time to come..

I am so amazed at how Letitia can still hold a smile and happy attitude amidst all this hard work. She did not miss a step within the entire series of steps....I would be tripping all over the stage!
Mathena was dancing a midst 6yos and some 7yos. She's a 6yo waiting patiently to turn 7. She looks a sight in this outfit and this dance is aptly named "Classical ballet".
Don't they ALL look sooooo professional!!

Mathena managed to laugh and giggle most of the time, enjoying herself on the stage.
Well done! My dear girls, mommy and daddy are soooo proud of you both!

Mother's Day 2010

Simple dinner at Swensens....

Girls treat of 'Volcano'Now,...THIS is my treat! A coke float...except I will be up counting the stars tonight!Been a mom for at least 9 years now..I thank GOD for my children, without whom this journey will not be worthwhile. Thanks also to my dear hubby who's loved me and stood strong as a father to the girls. I cannot ask for anything more.

As usual the girls were bursting to celebrate it
with me and yes, we celebrated on Saturday night, gifts and all.
Sunday at church this season is a time for serving. I have chosen
to be with my girls instead of alone in the church sanctuary!

Pulau Ubin-Labourous Day

We ventured as 2 families and 2 ladies on this trip...
Off we go on a 20min boat ride. We can see lots of the East side of Singapore along the way.
On arrival, we met with lots and lots of bicycle rentals...and this is before the crowds set in..

..then the bike adventure started. ..for the 6yos and 9yos, this is the start of many spills, falls, pushing of bike uphill etc...very tiring for the other adults (they had to help them!)
We saw inland lakes..
Walked and walked through preserved forestry...cool shades, phew!
From the mangroves, it opened up to the wide, sunny sea..
See the tiny hut, that's the only respite on the entire plank walk..
All in all a lovely adventure but we soon found out that we are creatures of comfort. The heat was too much, the ride was too painful and the mosquitoes were too hungry. Total kid count of mosquitoe bite were about 30 bites, sigh! Good to have met you, Pulau Ubin. Here's the site, of the nice resort we didn't go to.

Words

Recently, our family has been experiencing quite a few 'learning'
moments from life at school. One thing leading to another, it
has come to my realization that 'words' are indeed powerful
things that comes out of our mouth and unless we make an
effort to curb it, it creates plenty of damage.

This happened in one of my daughters class. To protect all parties
involved I will not be naming anyone. During class time, some boys,
namely boyA, boyB and boyC was happily teasing each other with
the rude "F" word. We were shocked when we found out about this and we were
somewhat disapointed that most families allow such words in their
child's vocabulary and have not made any efforts to teach them self control.
Anyway, as my daughter continued to explained, this is NOT the
first occurence. These words were used in a rhymes, to create jokes,
and also used to stir/tease each other. Soon being annoyed, my girl noted that boyC have finally succumbed to the teasing and was in tears. She tried to ask the other 2 (who was at that
point laughing) boys to stop but with angry tones, they teased her instead.

Here lies the issue.
All this happened because these boys had a heart to tease, embarrass
and victimised boyC. They were actually laughing when they could
see their 'friend' in tears. Instead of stopping, they further rubbed it in
that he's always crying etc. Why has bullying become so 'easy' and without conscience in the hearts of these kids? This 'pack behaviour' only stood strong as it was a ratio of 2 against 1.
The poor crying kid was actually bigger in stature yet he was helpless.As a result, we had to teach into our daughter,
which child to avoid and be careful with her dealings of them. For
her sake, we had to make it known to her that these boys are not
'desirable' company. This is just primary school, sigh! We also had to
teach her how to help the 'underdog' and comfort the one
who's being hurt. We had to re-introduce the idea that bullying of all
sorts 'hurt' and very much to our discomfort, the one who's bullying
is actually the one who has in-depth 'issues'.

Words hurt or words heal. We have to choose how to use them!
These 2 weeks, our girls have been memorising:
Proverbs 15:1 A gentle answer turns away wrath,
but a harsh word stirs up anger.
We've had an open window to teach this lesson into their hearts.

See another blog about a mom who knows the power of words
to encourage her child.

Magical Hong Kong

When we first planned to go to Hong Kong, we were quite unsure if
we can pull it off with the girls. Disney was a draw card but we
were determined to show them more than the magic kingdom. Everything
was planned and booked for within 2 weeks, the fastest decision
on travels we ever did.
I 'pushed' Letitia onto the stage for a boogey with High School Musical, she was NOT
impressed! LOL!
The Mickey Mouse Candy Floss made up for it..
Visiting Tarzan in his tree house...but too bad he was not in, only his statues were.

We discovered Discovery Bay with my old school friend Katie, what a lovely time together!
We ate these...and more..

Girls fell in love with Wonton Noodles (like me!)



Freezing Victoria Peak in the evening...
We visited the amazing Noah's Ark in Ma-Wan Island.

We'd like to say thanks to the Yue family for hosting us, Grandma Yue for taking us around, to Scarlet and family for the amazing reunion, for Unc Kelvin for making the entire trip to easy, to Eugene and Ange for hosting us with the mountain size goose dinner and not to forget, Katie for spending a whole magical time with me and the kids! God Bless all!